Send Dallaglio into retirement
Lawrence Dallaglio has made a right mess of things by criticising Brian Ashton in order to sell copies of his book.
Make no mistake, I’m his biggest fan, but vent your frustrations by sending him into retirement with this ridiculous game, and post your score underneath. It’s all about timing!
Bless Jonny’s Boot!
It could be the deciding factor tomorrow, so show your support! http://www.blesstheboot.com/
Remember the Aussies and their voodoo dolls inviting people to stick pins in Jonny’s left leg? Now you can give the boots a rub and hope they do us proud again.
Quick guide to rugby for those that have jumped on the bandwagon
Following the Bluffer’s Guide to the Rugby World Cup, here is a quick overview of rugby for those that have jumped on the England Rugby bandwagon - the more the merrier by the way.
The history
Rugby was invented in England (in Rugby would you believe?) by William Webb Ellis nearly 200 years ago - seeing an opportunity to improve on the boring game of ’soccer’ he was involved in, he picked up the ball and ran with it. And therein lies the essence of the game.
The game
Fifteen players (8 forwards and 7 backs) on each side attempt to touch the oval-shaped ball down over the other team’s try line (a try) to score 5 points, after which they will try to kick it over the posts to convert it into 7 points. Dropped goals - everyone knows what they are thanks to Jonny - and penalty kicks are worth 3 points.
Forwards tend to be bigger and slower, whilst backs are usually smaller and faster. Obviously there are some exceptions to this - Jonah Lomu was a back and was massive and fast, Andy Farrell is a back and is exceptionally slow.
Players run carrying the ball and can only pass sideways or backwards to one another, or they can kick it wherever they like. Scrums and lineouts are ways of restarting the game, whilst rucks and mauls happen when a player is tackled and everyone else fights to get the ball back.
The strategy
Most teams will try to get their forwards running at the opposition defenders a couple of times, knocking them over and creating space elsewhere for the backs to run into and score a try.
England is slightly different in this respect as the forwards will just try to get close enough to the posts for Jonny to get a dropped goal, but who cares because at the end of the game, the team with the most points wins!
Invitation to post your rugby jokes…
There are quite a few floating around at the moment, so write any that you find in a comment on here.
One of my personal favourites…
What would you call the 7th v 8th playoff if they had one?
The Bledisloe Cup
Adidas start new range…
Born to rule…
New aussie wine…
England launch special edition World Cup jersey
Blow for Wallabies as Gregan is arrested
A bluffer’s guide to surviving the Rugby World Cup
I was at a barbecue on Sunday and inevitably, the conversation turned to Rugby. Immediately, one or two people felt slightly at a loss of things to contribute to the conversation, and so here is The Rugby Blog guide to surviving the World Cup for those that don’t know their rucks from their mauls. Following these simple guidelines will enhance enjoyment for rugby novices, whilst preventing the annoyance of those in the know. Feel free to post your own additions to the guide!
Five choice phrases to slip into any rugby conversation:
1. “The thing with France is that you just don’t know which team will turn up, but I really think they could win it.”
2. “You can never under-estimate Australia, but I’m just not sure their front five is good enough to win a World Cup.”
3. “The English look less dangerous in attack than the Swiss army.”
4. “The Springboks would be almost unbeatable if they could just keep 15 players on the pitch for the full 80 minutes.”
5. “I thought James Simpson-Daniel was unlucky to miss out on selection for the World Cup squad.”
Five things to avoid saying at all costs
1. “I quite like the new England kit” - this will immediately put you in the minority.
2. “Can’t we watch something else?” - no we can’t, Romania v Portugal should be a good game.
3. “How many goals did we win by?” - two things wrong with this. a) Wrong sport, and b) You should know the score anyway.
4. “I didn’t even know they played rugby in Georgia” - well, they do and the limitations of their defensive-based strategy is worthy of significant airtime.
5. “I thought Jason Robinson and Lawrence Dallaglio had retired?” - actually they did, but now they are back and everyone is thankful, so don’t even think about mentioning the average age of the England team
General etiquette during the match
Do not say things like “What’s the score?” (it’s on the screen), or “Which team is which?” (if you don’t know, wait until one team scores and see whose score changes) - it will only annoy everyone trying to watch, and they might miss a good bit.
Phrases like “Shoe him!” - when an opposition player is in the way when the ball is on the ground - will earn you respect. Any comments concerning the tightness of the players’ shorts will not, and you may be asked to leave.
As a general rule of thumb, if you are not completely confident of saying something sensible, then don’t say anything.
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